Why they put Kim Davis in Jail


Okay guys, yesterday you stumped me and my post kinda fell apart at the end. (read it here.) But I’ve been thinking about a response and I think I have a real zinger.

Basically, you said I made too big a deal of the fact that when they sent Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis to jail they didn’t handcuff her. I claimed that it proved de facto she was not a lawless criminal who deserved jail. What lawless criminal do you lead to jail unhandcuffed?

Apparently some white collar criminals do go to jail on their own volition. Okay. But there’s something more at play. Once you see it, you’ll see it in other places. (I noticed it today in a story we read from the Bible at home church.)

When you notice it repetedly, you’ll know exactly what I’m trying to explain in my upcoming article, New American Barbarian.

Sack Rome with a Court Order

So what is a New American Barbarian? They are godless liberals who fight against Christian civilization wielding words as their weapons of destruction.

What I’m alluding to here is the legend of the sack of Rome by the Barbarians. Now I know that a lot of this is legend so you history pedants don’t need to correct me in the comments. Yes, historical truth is more nuanced than popular knowledge. (imagine that.) But I’m riffing on the legend. Here it is:

Barbarians sacked Rome. That would be amazing, except they did it not while Rome was at it’s peak, but when Rome was in deep decline. So it wasn’t that amazing. In fact, it was kind of cowardly. Where were all these tough guys when Julius was general?

First the Barbarian tribe called Goths invaded the city. (Or was it Visigoths?) They did their conquering and left. Then the barbarian tribe called the Vandals attacked Rome. And according to legend they went crazy destroying this and that.

They got a terrible reputation through history with all the stuff they ruined in Rome. I mean, it would be understandable for them to come in and loot all the gold and rape the hot women. But they weren’t content with just that. They went around smashing art and architecture. They’re the ones who smashed the noses, arms, and dinkies off of ancient Roman statues.

They were such jerks in their pillaging that the term vandalism comes from them.

That’s what Judge Bunning and the gaystapo are. Vandals. But they use words instead of barbarian swords. They needlessly smash Christian civilization with court orders and laws. Why? To desecrate it.

Go to Jail, He Said

What they are doing to Kim Davis is needless. I mean, jail?! But when you understand these people are just Vandals who use words it all makes sense.

Think about it. Two gay guys walk into the county court house gay hand in hand, right up to the counter. And they’re like, “Excuse me, we’d like a gay marriage license.”

And Kim Davis says, “No.”

And these gays throw a hissy fit.

“Uh, what do you mean, ‘no?’ I’m a young gay Christian. Me and Billy have been saving our gay virginity for today when we can finally get gay married and Billy can nail my virginal ass.”

And then Billy’s like, “Uhh, no. I thought you were going to nail my virginal ass.”

And the other gay is like, “Billy, let’s not argue about this now. We’re going to need to keep our Gay Purity rings on for a few more days because this bitch won’t gay marry us! Why not?”

And Kim Davis is like, “It’s against my religious beliefs.”

And Billy’s groom-to-be is like, “Oh a hope you die, you hate-filled scum bag! I’m reporting you to the authorities.”

And they storm out trying to keep their pouty faces on, but smiles start breaking through because they know they will be gay heroes and on the cover of gay newspapers.

What happened may have been more nuanced than that. But I just now created a legend. Because here’s the thing: Why did they need that piece of paper?

War of Words over a Piece of Paper

What else is a marriage license besides a piece of paper? The clerk records the applicants’ names, addresses, place of birth, and mother’s maiden name. Then she signs it and puts it into that stamp thing. You know that one where you pull the lever and it crinkles the paper with the state seal. Thump. Notarized.

This is where their New American Barbarianism really shines through. It’s not the paper they want, it’s the words on the piece of paper. What words? Kim Davis’s signature! They delusionally believe they will validate their shame by desecrating a Christian.

When you reread that CNN article I linked two days ago, I think now you’ll see what I had trouble explaining yesterday. They want to use their words to make her do things. Not just any things. Desecrating things.

Read the lead from that article:

Rowan County, Kentucky, clerk Kim Davis was given a second chance: She didn’t have to issue same-sex marriage licenses herself; she merely had to agree not to interfere with five deputy clerks who had told the federal judge they’d issue them in her stead.

But Davis’ lawyer told U.S. District Judge David Bunning that his client would not allow her deputies to issue the licenses.

LOL to these gay federal officials who gave Kim Davis a “second chance.” They were acting like all the gays were allergic to bees and got stung and Kim Davis had all the epi-pens locked in a safe and she wouldn’t give them the combination.

They made what seemed like a reasonable offer. (to them.) Hey, just give the gay couples the paper with their names on it, stamp it with the seal of Kentucky, and one of your deputies will sign it.

Look at the quote from above: “Davis’ lawyer told U.S. District Judge David Bunning that his client would not allow her deputies to issue the licenses.”

Okay so what does that mean? She wouldn’t “allow her deputies to issue licenses.” Did Kim Davis stand near the counter where they keep the notary stamp with a machete.

“Any of you deputy clerks dare pull the lever on a gay marriage cert and you’ll lose your fingers. Just try me, bozos!” Wham!

No. Obviously she didn’t threaten violence or use physical force to prevent the deputies for doing the stampy thing. She just uttered some words. She said, “Deputies, by the authority vested in me, I prohibit you from gay marrying anyone.” (maybe not those exact words.)

Words. We’re back to words.

Let me ask a question now. When in the history of gaydom did they become scrupulous about the legality of their marriage licenses?

Remember in 2004 when the San Francisco mayor, Gavin Newsom, defied California’s Proposition 8 referendum and they started unilaterally issuing gay marriage licenses? I’d say the legality of those pieces of paper were dubious, yet we saw a veritable queer steer stampede for them.

So what’s the difference? Why do these New American Barbarians need Kim Davis to sign the paper herself? Why is she in jail? Couldn’t they just ignore her existence and just start handing out the licenses willie-nillie?

Something changed. But what?

To give us answer, we need to look to the highest profile gay bride of the Mayor Newsom batch, Rosie O’Donnell. Read this from the San Francisco Gate, on February 27, 2004:

Comedian Rosie O’Donnell, in a show of defiance against President Bush’s push for a constitutional ban on same-sex marriage, stood on the grand staircase at San Francisco City Hall Thursday and introduced the world to her new wife.
O’Donnell and Kelli Carpenter, who have been together six years and are raising four children, left their New York home at 5 a.m. to get to San Francisco in time for a 1 p.m. wedding appointment. The nuptials made O’Donnell the most prominent celebrity to tie the same-sex knot in San Francisco.
The comedian said she decided to make the cross-country trip after Bush announced Tuesday that he wanted an amendment to the U.S. Constitution to prevent gays and lesbians from marrying.

“We were both just trying to come here after the sitting president said the vile and vicious and hateful comments he did on Tuesday and inspired myself and my brand-new wife to fly here this morning,” O’Donnell said.

Theirs was one of about 3,200 same-sex marriages performed in the city since Feb. 12, when Mayor Gavin Newsom launched a constitutional challenge to the state ban on gay and lesbian nuptials.

So Rosie O’Donnell had been together with this chick for 6 years. San Francisco had been handing out licenses for a couple of weeks. What’s a matter, Did O’Donnell not love her domestic partner? Why did she wait and what made her suddenly fly out in one day?

The words of George W. Bush.

See what I’m saying? George Bush uttered some words and suddenly Rosie O’Donnell needs to get some official looking words on a paper to desecrate a Christian man, namely George W. Bush.

But that was 11 years ago. The bar has really been raised for New American Barbarians to desecrate Christians.

Now these gays need to make Christians perform weddings against their will. Tying ropes around Kim Davis’s hands and making her sign the licenses like a marionette won’t cut it. They need to command her with words and she must comply.

These New American Barbarians chanted “Love wins! Love wins!” as the US Marshall lead Mrs. Davis out of the courthouse to jail (but not in handcuffs.)

What kind of love is that? Who cheers for incarceration of someone so law abiding that she thanks the judge for his ruling and walks away to jail unhandcuffed? Barbarians who fly across country to spite George W. Bush. Vandals who want to see Kim Davis behind bars.

That’s not love. That’s desecration of the personification of love, Jesus Christ.

End Note

Guys, thanks for reading. There’s more to write about New American Barbarians. So stay tuned. But to shift tack, tomorrow I’ll have something I’ve already written about Donald Trump and how he relates to my definition of Politics. I just need to type it up. It’s a little late but still pertinent.

Also, near the begining of this, I used the phrase de facto. I don’t know if I used it correctly. Whatever.

Related posts:


  1. […] Kentucky county clerk who refused to sign gay marriage licenses. I made the point in an article, Why they put Kim Davis in Jail, that her signature had no bearing on the actual nature of a gay couple’s […]

  2. […] morning, I first started thinking about how stupid the name New American Barbarian is. I typed it a bunch of times this weekend as I wrote about the barbaric legal vandalism of Christian civilization as […]

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