Who takes the gallbladder from a dead bear? A Chinese. 

The drudge report has a link up that says Bear Found with Paws, Gallbladder Removed on CA Freeway…

Drudge put it up because it’s one of those bizarre news stories. You read it and are like who in the world would cut off a gallbladder and paws from a dead bear beside the road?

A Chinese! That’s who.

According to CBS Los Angeles, Caltrans and the California Fish and Wildlife are treating it like a crime. A serious crime.

Caltrans workers found the bear, believed to have been about two years old and around 150 pounds, on Highway 14 near Sand Canyon Road, according to the state Department of Fish and Wildlife. Its four paws and gallbladder had been removed.

“For somebody else to come over and maim the animal after it’s already dead or wounded, that’s just not right at all as far as I’m concerned,” said Todd Werner of Canyon Country.

Fish and Wildlife spokesman Andrew Hughan told the Los Angeles Times investigators believe the bear was mutilated after it was hit.

“There were no signs of a gunshot, broken legs or hip — this was a crime of opportunity,” Hughan was quoted as saying. “We are very confident it was hit by a car. This desecration of the body was done afterward.”

The department of fish and wildlife says cutting animal parts off road kill is illegal.

A crime of opportunity, eh? Well put out an all-points-bulletin to be on the lookout for a Chinese suspect.

The Chinese love gallbladders and gallstones. Their demand for bear and cow gallbladders has created a huge international black market.

Or should I say green market? That’s what color the gallbladder is, right?

Anyways, in Australia, they are burgling butcher shops of cow gallstones.

And remember my post about the Chinese man who hit the lottery when it turned out his dog had a giant gallstone worth a ton of money?

You may be mystified about the Chinese infatuation with gallbladders and wonder why it is.

Guys, don’t ask me to make sense of the Chinese.

But I will say this. Bear bile has been clinically proven to have beneficial effects on people with gallbladder disease.

I know that because I suffer from gallstones and I take a medicine called ursodiol. It’s prescribed by my doctor. You know, with a lab coat and stethoscope. Not a robe and a gong.

This is an actual medicine. A western medicine. Ursodiol.

But its origin lies in eastern medicine. Ursodiol is just synthesized bear bile. It’s a particular bile acid. And it’s named after bears. Urso means bear in Greek.

Before they synthesized it, the Chinese used to extract it from bears. And hence, there aren’t many bears left in Asia.

Yes, bear bile is an effective treatment for gallstones in humans. But as far as all the other purported benefits touted by Chinese medicine who knows?!

I mean will eating a bear gallbladder really increase my virility, relive my sinus infection, clear up my dandruff, and make my beard thicker? I mean, really!?

Well, I guess there’s only one way to find out.

If any of you feedingjimmy.com readers in California have a Chinese neighbor with a dent in his Honda that’s filled with bear hair, tell them you got a buyer. 

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2 comments

  1. Anonymous says:

    Do you even have an inkling of an idea of how racist you sound?

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