Here’s how Tom Brady and the Patriots Cheat. And how #Deflategate punished them.


ESPN implicitly admitted that there’s nothing to Deflategate. Finally! In an article by Don Van Natta Jr. and Seth Wickersham, titled Spygate to Deflategate: Inside what split the NFL and Patriots apart, they claim the NFL tried to over-punish the Patriots in Deflategate to compensate for under-punishing them in Spygate.

You know, like how a referee might make a bad call for one team to make up for a bad call against their opponent.

Thank you, gentlemen, for taking a step in the right direction. This whole football inflation charade went on long enough. I’m glad you’re putting it behind you. I’m sorry you reverted right back to Spygate, but maybe now we can stop acting sanctimonious about football psi.

Now I want to confess something too. Yes, the Patriots do cheat. And there’s one way specifically that Tom Brady cheats. Deflategate unjustly punished the Patriots and targeted Tom Brady for the reasons I will explain.

How the Patriots Cheat

First off, I when I said the Patriots cheat, I don’t mean they systematically broke the written rules of the NFL. It’s not justice that the Patriots violated in their actions. It’s fairness.

The NFL is predicated upon fairness. It’s really hokey, but each team is supposed to have a good chance to win the Super Bowl each year. But in this age of supposed parity, the Patriots ran away with more NFL titles than anyone else. It’s not even close. The Patriots dynasty has reigned since 2001.

That’s why the Deflategate punishment first targeted the team. The loss of a draft pick dramatically impacts a team for years. That was the intention of Commissioner Roger Goodell. He’s handicapping the Patriots to give the other owners a better chance to have their pathetic little teams bring home the Lombardi Trophy.

They are jealous that Patriots owner Robert Kraft turned a little stadium in a lonely, wooded Massachusetts town into Patriots Place. This destination generates money year-round for Kraft. It wouldn’t have been possible without the Patriots dynasty.

These owners want a return on their investment for their stadiums. It’s supposed to just come to them eventually. That’s the purpose behind the engineered parity of the NFL. But unfortunately, winning takes more work than their willing to put in. Especially when Tom Brady rolls into town.

How Tom Brady Cheated.

If you’re an NFL owner, how do you compete against Tom Brady and the New England Patriots? Well, if you’re an NFL owner, you can’t strap on a helmet and take the field. You’re just a pencil-neck geek. But you’re a rich pencil-neck geek.

Spending money is all an NFL owner can do to try and compete against the Patriots.

Okay, so the Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones pays big money on a contract to keep Tony Romo. Great! He’s locked in an elite, high-caliber quarterback. So he should be winning Super Bowls, right?

Wrong. The bigest part of NFL parity is the salary cap. There’s a limit to the total amount of money a team can spend on all of its players. So when the Dallas Cowboys spend so much money on Tony Romo, they have to shuffle away money from other parts of the team. That affects their ability to survive the playoffs.

Meanwhile in New England, the greatest quarterback of all time, Tom Brady doesn’t demand the greatest amount of money of all time. That allows New England coach Bill Bellichick the money to spend on other parts of the team. This makes them more successful deep into the post season and all the way to the Super Bowl.

And that’s how Tom Brady cheats!

No, he didn’t violate any rules. But it’s just so unfair to the other owners that the Patriots get Tom Brady at a discount.

And so Deflategate targeted Tom Brady. Commisioner Goddell fined him an unprecedented amount to punish him. He benched him for 4 games to give some other teams a chance to beat the reigning Super Bowl champs.

Worst of all, Goodell implicated him in this football inflation crime that, by-the-way, he didn’t prove even happened. This is nothing more than spite. He tried to tarnish the reputation of the greatest active player in his league. That’s slander! That’s unjust! It’s supid!

It took an outside federal judge to overturn the fine and suspension. But no judge can slam a gavel down and repair Tom Brady’s reputation. Not when media organizations such as ESPN fan the flame of jealously in low-information sports fans around the country.

These football fans are jilted by repeated defeats of their teams at the hands of the New England Patriots. They aren’t aware of the nuanced details behind Spygate. But the authors of the above ESPN article, Van Natta Jr. and Wickersham, don’t mind dredging up the storyline, and adding other unsubstantiated accusations of cheating.

The article doesn’t apologize for ESPN’s repeated lies and misreports regarding Deflategate, it just doubles down on Spygate. As Tom E. Curran points out in this tweet, the above article is “10,704 words long. Of those, 9,120 are devoted to videotaping scandal of 2007.”

With the one-sided story they present, I seriously worry about the Patriots’ physical safety. With the dissension ESPN has stirred, it might stoke some crazy guy to act out violently from the stands. Or worse still, some idiot defenseman might feel justified in landing a late hit at Tom Brady’s knees.

That’s ironic considering all the handwringing ESPN does about concussions.

So in conclusion, the Patriots cheat. Not by breaking the rules, but by winning.

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