Look at the cover pages of today’s two New York tabloids reporting on the San Bernardino massacre. The Daily News blasts Republicans for praying to God rather than “truly ending gun scourge.” Contrast that with The Post that shows two victims with the caption “Muslim killers.”
One situation, but two different takes from New York’s tell-it-like-it-is papers.
So what is it? Do we have a gun scourge? Or a Muslim killers?
If you have the ability to reason, and you can connect cause and effect, then you’d say Muslim scourge. Right? Put two and two together. If you hear someone yell Alu Ackbar that means you better run like hell!
(Excuse me for using a little New York vernacular here. We’re talking about their tabloids after all.)
But if you’re captivated by the delusion of liberals, then you hate guns. They’re so nasty. They just make you feel unsafe. Never mind if you’re actually safe or not. It’s all about if you feel safe.
Well, you know what I say? I say the real problem here is liberals. I blame them for all this.
Right now some liberals reading this are like, “Screw you, you hate-filled, mean-spirited Christian. How dare you make this political! We’re trying to get guns off the streets while you’re praying to your fairy tale God.”
Wait, I’m making this political? You’re the one who scorned the condolences of Republicans, thereby making this problem political.
“Thoughts and prayers” is the boilerplate phrase all politicians use after massacres — Republican and Democrat. Why didn’t you find Democrat senators offering thoughts and prayers on Twitter?
I mean since Obama took office, these shootings have become so commonplace that most politicians’ Twitter feeds are just a steady stream of “thoughts and prayers.”
The only difference is that Democrats break up their “thoughts and prayers” tweets with demands for more gun control.
So if “thoughts and prayers” are ineffective and insulting, are gun control laws any better?
Think about why liberals hate these “thoughts and prayers” tweets. It’s the prayers part that really bothers them.
To them, God does not exist. So when something bad happens, and a politician says “my thoughts and prayers go out to the victims in this tragedy,” he has actually done nothing! Prayers do nothing to cause an effect in the real world.
There’s no God. He will not swoop down and make the terrorists weapons fail to explode. (You know, like what happened with the shoe bomber, the underwear bomber, the times square bomber, and the guy who threw a grenade at President Bush.)
I mean, yea, prayers might console someone. An interfaith prayer service brings people together in bad times. But that’s all in people’s head. Politicians should only mention God as an emotional analgesic. You know, for all the stupid Christians down south.
God only matters to people who believe in God. And we liberals don’t believe in God anymore than we believe in a flying spaghetti monster. But if a politician mentions God, it’s okay if he’s just steering the common folk away from doing something crazy and unpredictable.
Look, people who believe in God do crazy things. Like, unfortunately, some Muslims. No! I mean people who claim to be Muslim. And these extremist fake Muslims are very few in number compared to the Muslims who are nice guys.
God would never tell anyone to do anything bad.
I know I just said I didn’t believe in God, but for everyone who does believe in God, we need to get the word out that he doesn’t want us to kill others.
God — or Allah, or Jesus, or whatever you call him– he just wants us to love each other. Love, not hate. Flowers, not guns.
Oh my God, guns are so nasty! So, so bad. Just thinking about a long assault rifle with all those nasty do-hickies on them. If someone who believes in God got his hands on one of those, he might hear God tell him to shoot people at the mall!
Oh, I don’t want to go to the mall now. Not if there’s guns. I feel so unsafe. I’m having a nervous breakdown. Mom! Mom! Mommy! Bring me down some Prozac. It’s happening again. Ahhhh!
Okay, okay. Let me stop this liberal role playing now. I’m going to reign it in. I’m back to myself. My not-liberal self.
Do laws exist?
Well yea. They kinda do, right? Politicians write laws, vote on them, pass them, and we can read them.
But those are just words! It’s just black ink on a white page. Do laws actually exist materially? Like when they pass a law does a physical machine appear that enforces the stipulations of the law?
No. It’s not like when Obama says, “If you like your doctor you can keep your doctor.” poof An ED209 cyborg appears and physically brings your doctor to your waiting room if he refuses to treat you.
Laws do not actually exist. They do not actually cause a material effect on the universe. Therefore, laws are no more effective than thoughts and prayers.
If the Democrats repeal the second amendment, guns would still exist. It’s not like they would disappear like Marty McFly’s hand when Biff Tannen stole his mom away from his dad in 1955. (sorry, pop culture reference.)
Liberals hate when Republicans offer thoughts and prayers after a massacre because thoughts and prayers do nothing. They say we should act. Do something!
Guess what. Passing laws isn’t doing something. How is passing laws different than offering thoughts and prayers?
A prayer you offer to God and hope it makes him do something. But it’s a vain hope if God doesn’t exist.
A gun control law you offer to your citizens. You hope it makes them do something. But it’s a vain hope because laws only apply to people who believe in and then obey the laws.
On D-day, our American servicemen who stormed the beach in Normandy didn’t observe the stringent gun laws there. (and that’s a good thing.) But when Muslims storm our beaches, cities, towns, schools, and social services centers, why do liberals delusionally hope they will regard our laws?
But it gets worse! Muslims aren’t storming our country. They don’t have the resources to make the trip halfway around the globe. Muslims are being shuttled in by liberals in our government!
And this is why I say the liberal scourge is worse than the Muslim killers, which is worse than the gun scourge: guns don’t have a will to kill. But muslims do. And liberals are dispersing them all over our country.