5 reasons Weird Al should headline the Super Bowl Halftime Show

  
Weird Al should headline the Super Bowl halftime show. That was my first thought when I woke up from Super Bowl 50’s halftime lullaby. Here’s 5 reasons Weird Al Yankovich will bring the biggest laughs to the world’s biggest stage.

1. Weird Al is funny

The Super Bowl attracts millions of casual sports fans who all say, “I’m just watching it for the commercials.”

Okay, so are they eager to know what pickup offers best in class towing? Do the usually shop for homeowners insurance on Sunday nights with their friends at the bar?

No. They want to laugh.

The Super Bowl commercials provide the comic relief for the tragedy unfolding on field.

Why not meet that demand for humor at halftime? The NFL should bring in a wild haired funnyman with a fuzzy mustache who plays parody songs on his accordion.

2. Weird Al has widespread appeal.

The NFL wants a halftime show that appeals to a wide audience. Usually they feature several acts each representing a different genre.

Fortunately for the league, Weird Al is an equal opportunity spoofer. This versatile parody artist scored hits making spoofs of rock, pop, hip hop, and even love ballads!

Did you like it when Coldplay really mellowed out the crowd with their slow as molasses music?

Well, Weird Al would liven the crowd with a peppy Super Bowl Polka medley. It would get fans on the edge of their seats, glued to the TV, and forgetting about much needed bathroom breaks.

3. Food Based Humor.

On the Super Bowl gridiron, the world’s best athletes perform amazing feats of speed, strength, and endurance. Meanwhile, the rest of us sit on the couch stuffing our faces with nachos, cheese, and beer.

Who’s kidding who? The Super Bowl isn’t a sporting event. It’s a gastronomical event. Good thing a common theme through Weird Al’s music is food.

It just makes so much sense that when Weird Al takes to the stage in a fat suit to sing “Eat it,” that we’d all be fighting reverse peristalsis as we laugh.

4. Weird Al is popular

If I told you Weird Al won a whole ton of Grammy awards, you’d be impressed. That is until you realize there’s not much competition in his genre of musical parodies.

But there’s one thing you cannot fake. Sales.

Weird Al topped the Billboard 100 last year. Not the Billboard 100 of parody music, the Billboard 100 of music he parodied!

The funnyman has been building a devoted fanbase since the 1980’s. We now see a phenomenon where kids know the Weird Al spoof of songs they’ve never heard.

The NFL needs to bring these multiple generations of fans together at one monumental halftime concert.

5. Sorry, Jocks, it’s a Nerds’ world now.

You can divide American Culture into two segments. Jock and Nerd.

In previous decades, Jocks dominated the culture. While Jock soaked in the glory of the high school pep rally, Nerds stayed at home reading comics, programming computers, and listening to Weird Al tapes.

But now our culture has shifted as we’ve become utterly dependent on technology. Nerds have stolen the spotlight. They are the heroes now.

Look at the popularity of the nerds in the popular network television sitcom, The Big Band Theory.

The NFL cannot deny the nerd factor even in their own league. They accept millions of dollars in advertisement from Marvel comics. Their players and coaches are hunched over Microsoft tablets on the sideline.

So if the NFL sells the comic super heroes of nerds, and uses the technology of nerds, why not play the music of nerds, Weird Al Yankovich?

Commissioner Goodell, please stop nitpicking the psi inflation of footballs. (we nerds know the ideal gas law.) Instead, sign Weird Al Yankovich to the Super Bowl halftime roster. It will be a real shot of HGH* to the game.

*Humor Growth Hormone.

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