How did they arrest Kim Davis?

Guys, the past couple days have been busy at work. I’ve only been able to follow the Kim Davis saga in bits and pieces as time and data rates have allowed. So I know that they locked up the county clerk from Kentucky who refused to issue gay marriage licenses. But I got a question. How did they arrest her?

The reason I ask is because the way that they put Kim Davis into prison could play into a new post I’m writing called The New American Barbarian. Remember those Barbarians of ancient days who sacked Rome? Well, the ungodly of today’s America are like those savages except they use words instead of swords.

When I say words, I don’t mean destructive magical incantations like wizard-warriors from Lord of the Rings. When I say words, I’m talking about written law and authoritative commands.

Now the judge told Kim Davis she must issue gay marriage licenses or else. And Kim Davis didn’t issue gay marriage licenses. So did a SWAT team physically storm her home like the Branch Dividians and point a rifle at her like Elian Gonzales?

I haven’t checked yet, that’s why I’m asking. If I’m correct in my hunch about this whole situation, I’d predict that the judge said to her, “You have until Friday at 9:00 am to issue marriage licenses to male and female gays. If you do not comply, you must report to prison by 10:00 am at the East Gate. Please report by 11:00 am so we can have to booked by noon. We’re banging out early for the long Labor Day weekend.”

You guys see what I’m asking? They verbally are forcing her to issue licenses. Since she defied their order, did they verbally force her to walk into prison? I’ll check tomorrow and follow up with you so make sure to return to!

Why I Moved Out Of Boston

Same sex marriage is wrong

Two years ago, I moved my family out of Boston. At that time, if you had asked me why I quit my job and sold my house, I would have muttered something about money. It’s true that Boston is expensive. But that’s not the real reason I left. I moved out because of gay marriage. Boston, Massachusetts is the new Sodom and Gomorrah.

Right now some people are like, “Jimmy, what’s a matter? You afraid of fire and brimstone?”

No, I’m not afraid of fire and brimstone. I’m afraid of the knock at the door.

Look to the original story of Sodom and Gomorrah in the Bible’s book of Genesis, chapter 19. Two angels sent by God went into the city to see if it was as sinful as was reported. Abraham’s nephew Lot saw the two and invited them into his home. But once they got there, all the men of the town surrounded the house. They wanted to gay marry the visitors.

Is that the kind of knock on the door that you want? I don’t. That’s why I moved out of Boston. As a society becomes more wicked, it pushes God out of its life. Without knowledge of God, people lose their ability to reason. They become brute beasts who think of nothing except to satisfy their sexually perverted urges.

And so the Angels dragged Lot out of town and destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah with fire and brimstone. In a way that was kind of a mercy killing. Like a dog catcher putting down a rabid dog. He can’t hurt himself anymore and he can’t infect others.

Right now some people are horrified. They’re like, “Jimmy, I’m a Christian. I have a real heart for Boston. I pray every day that God sends revival. Shame on you for saying such nasty, hateful things about gays!”

Oh, aren’t you a pillar of faith!

You know what? You remind me of Lot. He’s sitting there in his house, surrounded by gay rapists, and the two angels are telling him to leave, but he dilly dallies. Maybe he was praying for revival.

As morning dawned, the angels urged Lot, saying, “Up! Take your wife and your two daughters who are here, lest you be swept away in the punishment of the city.” But he lingered. So the men seized him and his wife and his two daughters by the hand, the Lord being merciful to him, and they brought him out and set him outside the city. And as they brought them out, one said, “Escape for your life. Do not look back or stop anywhere in the valley. Escape to the hills, lest you be swept away.”
- Genesis 19:15–17

Massachusetts was founded by Puritan Christians almost 400 years ago. Its capital city, Boston, is filled with wicked smart people. Yet these people have rejected God. How are you, me, or anyone going to reason with them to unreject God? You can’t. Like I said, God gives us our very ability to reason.

And so all these brainiacs in Boston can’t find a reason to not enact gay marriage, and so they do. They ignore divine revelation, human history, and the nature of reality. Gay marriage is a sign of nothing more than total depravity.


I remember that day two years ago when the truck pulled away with all our belongings. We did one last walk through of our house, and I paused for a moment with my family on the front steps. The hectic moments of selling a house and moving everything out were over. Now we just took a moment in the sunshine of the New England springtime to reflect on all the memories we had living in that house.

In the sweetness of that moment, I started second guessing if I was doing the right thing. I didn’t have a job and we hadn’t even decided what state to move to. (I was thinking either Texas or Tennessee.)

But then a silver van drove by that suddenly reaffirmed by decision to get out of Boston.

You see that silver van was driven by a pedophile who was stalking my kids. You may be wondering how I came to know that. He was a sunday school teacher at a church I attended. I actually left that church because they ordained women ministers and allowed single, obviously pedophile men to teach sunday school. But this guy kept driving by my house in that silver van and as far as I know he had no business being on my street.

Right now some people are like, “Jimmy, this is so typical of churches to have pedophile priests and sunday school teachers. Pedophilia has nothing to do with gay marriage.”

I forgot to tell you one thing. This silver van was a school bus. It was one of those short buses. This guy, who I think was a pedophile, became a sunday school teacher because the church lacked discernment. He also was able to get a job driving a school bus because the government lacks discernment.

Gay marriage shows that the society has no ability to discern right from wrong. I’m not going to stay in a city where me and my family will be harmed by the unrighteous recklessness around me.

Yes, God rescued Lot from the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. But the question is, was he really saved? He lost his wife when she looked back and became a pillar of salt. Then his daughters, products of the public school system, got Lot drunk and got themselves pregnant by him.

Why would I want to ruin my family pretending to save a city which God has dedicated to destruction?

Then I heard another voice from heaven saying,
“Come out of her, my people,
lest you take part in her sins,
lest you share in her plagues;
for her sins are heaped high as heaven,
and God has remembered her iniquities.
Pay her back as she herself has paid back others,
and repay her double for her deeds;
mix a double portion for her in the cup she mixed.
As she glorified herself and lived in luxury,
so give her a like measure of torment and mourning,
since in her heart she says,
‘I sit as a queen,
I am no widow,
and mourning I shall never see.’
For this reason her plagues will come in a single day,
death and mourning and famine,
and she will be burned up with fire;
for mighty is the Lord God who has judged her.”
- Revelation 18:4–8

Goodell hammers Brady in #DeflateGate — I PREDICTED THIS!


So Rodger Goodell finally announced his verdict against Tom Brady and the Patriots regarding DeflateGate and what can I say except I prediced this!

I’ve been saying for a long long time that the NFL doesn’t hold up justice as its standard. It holds up fairness. And look at the punishment the NFL brought against the Patriots: Tom Brady suspended for 4 games, a $1 million fine, and a loss of a first round draft pick. That’s unjust!

But to the mob of resentful, low-information sports fans, it’s only fair. The Patriots’s numerous victories is de facto proof that they cheat. And so DeflateGate provided an opportunity to punish them. Look at how the punishment singles out a single individual for no other reason than he is a prominent, successful man.

That’s what happens with fairness. All you can do is punish the successful.

Welcome to Barack Obama’s NFL

Now, let’s review the specifics of my predictions. I made a rhetorical point about the Colts culpability in DeflateGate. Let me restate it. If the Colts balls weren’t deflated by halftime, that’s proof that they cheated. Since they knew they would be dropping a dime, they were over-inflating their balls to make the Patriots look bad by comparison.

The Wells report proves I was more correct than I thought!

It publishes info regarding the recorded psi at halftime where we see the several of the Colt’s balls were borderline PSI. But by the end of the game, they were about the level that the Patriots were by the half, i.e. under-inflated. You would expect that given the weather conditions.

So the Colts failed in their own sting operation. As Tom Brady’s agent, David Yee so forcefully states:

The [Wells] report also presents significant evidence the NFL participated with the Colts in some type of pre-AFC Championship Game planning regarding the footballs. This fact may raise serious questions about the integrity of the games we view on Sundays.

How could this be? The NFL is fixated on the idea that the Patriots cheat. They win because they cheat. Their winning is proof that they cheat.

That’s the jist of the Wells report. The balls were under-inflated because the Patriots cheat. The Patriots cheat because the balls were under-inflated.

They were so sure of their delusion, that when the sting failed to bring the hard evidence they expected, they went ahead with a punishment for the crime they failed to find.

My next Bold Prediction

Since I’m on a roll here with these bold predictions, I’m going to make another right here. I predict we will discover the NFL referees tamper with the Patriots’ game balls. The suspect known as the Deflator, deflates balls over-inflated illegally by NFL referees.

Who Was Netenyahu’s Speech Directed To?

A lot of people heard Israeli prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s speech before the joint sessions of The United States Congress. They wondered who this speech was directed to.

Was he appealing to republicans? No. That’s preaching to the choir. Was it Obama? No. That fool won’t listen to the wise. Was it Iran? No.

Prime minister Netanyahu appealed not to any man. His speech appealed to justice. He held up the golden standard of justice. Israel stands under that standard.

To understand Israel’s just cause, you need to understand the abstract concept that goes hand in hand with justice, which is truth. Specifically you need to climb the ladder of truth which is logic.

So here’s the logic. Iran hates Israel and explicitly stated its goal to destroy God’s chosen nation. That’s a fact. A nuclear bomb is the ultimate weapon for instantly destroying a whole country. That’s a fact.

I can’t walk up the logic latter for you, but can you put two and two together? Iran wants a nuke to destroy Israel. That’s truth.

Israel is justified to fight for its life.

Unfortunately so many Americans cannot admit this conclusion because they do not understand justice nor to they acknowledge the truth.

“Evil men do not understand justice, but those who seek the LORD understand it completely.”
- Proverbs 28:5

President Barack Obama and the democrats hold up the standards of fairness and knowledge, not truth and justice. That’s why they weeped and gnashed their teeth in response to the speech.

It’s not fair that the Muslims don’t have a nuke. It’s not fair that Netanyahu gave a better speech than history’s greatest orator. It’s not fair that Netanyahu is more American than Obama. It’s not fair that Israel is now the single leader of the free world.

Americans who love truth and justice loved Netenyahoo’s speech. In fact, they love Netenyahoo. That’s because love is the third abstract concept that goes together with truth and justice.

See also, “truth and justice abstract concepts.”

First came the Windmillers, then came the Earthquakes

Guys, who or what is a fracker? London’s newspaper, The Independent, blamed them for Oklahoma’s earthquakes in an article posted on Drudge.

I’ve met many men out here in the West Texas oilfield. Guys who’ve swung hammers on fracking jobs, guys who drive sand trucks, guys who run coiled-tubing jobs. But nobody has introduced himself to me as a fracker.

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Kinkade, my name is Alistair Wimbledon and I am a fracker.”

Perhaps this speaks to the differences between our english and the Queen’s english. For example, the British word for truck is lorry.

Look, I’m a truck driver, not a lorry driver, or man-at-lory or lorryman, or whatever. Furthermore, I drive a Peterbilt. There is no British word for Peterbilt because their pompous dialect fails to describe such power.

The British lorry can barely pull its own weight never mind the weight of 120 barrels of produced water.

But anyways this article, entitled, “Frist came the frackers, then came the Earthquakes,” sums up the causality/correlation fallacy that science worshipers always succumb to.

The newspaper prints a frequency bar chart of number of Oklahoma earthquakes per year. Then there’s this red dotted line pointing at 2009. That’s the year fracking began. Then the earthquakes take off.

So it’s a forgone conclusion through the article. Obviously, it’s the frackers causing the earthquakes! Now panic!

That leads to the remarkable aspect of this article. The Sooners don’t care. They just don’t care! And the liberals at the Telegraph are up-in-arms. Where’s the outright ban of fracking?!

I’m sorry that the Sooners they interviewed accepted the premise that fracking causes earthquakes. Even still they clearly decided that the benefit of fracking outweighs the nuisance of barely perceptible earthquakes.

You know what, Raf Sanchez, sensationalist writer for the I made a chart, too. It shows the number of Oklahoma earthquakes by year and the ramping-up of windmill power over the same time. And there’s a correlation!

Furthermore, I propose a plausible explanation for how windmills cause earthquakes: They turn the tectonic plates into wind-blown hoovercrafts that crash into each other.

So I will entitle this post, “First came the Windmillers, then came the earthquakes.”

What’s a windmiller? I don’t know. As far as I know there is not an actual windmiller.

But it sounds scary. When I think windmiller, I think sleazy looking Spaniard in a trench coat. He creeps into small oklahoma towns, erects windmills, and flys back to spain before the ensuing earthquakes crumble the trailerhoods.

How many more homes will be destroyed before we end windmilling? Ban windmilling now! Get windmillers out of Oklahoma.

Obama at the National Prayer Breakfast

Last week at the National Prayer Breakfast, President Barack Obama told Christians to get off their high horse and stop judging Islam. Why? Because of the Crusades and the Spanish Inquisition.

Many wonder how this supposed genius could spout such delusional malarkey. (excuse my language.)

Guys, the explanation is simple. Obama sympathizes, appeases, and allies himself with Islam, not because he believes in its tenets, but because they commonly despise the success of Christianity.

If President Obama wants to broadly summarize history, we can.

In the first century AD, the people of the Middle East lived in advanced, civilized societies. Meanwhile, in Europe outside of Rome, Barbarians lived like barbarians.

Then as the Good News of Jesus Christ spread across Europe, those Barbarians became Christians. Look at the West now. We eradicate diseases and feed ourselves to the point of obesity. When we wage war, it’s to free people and not oppress them. With such advanced technology and wealth, we put men on the moon in our spare time.

Speaking of moons, what can we say about the men who wave the crescent moon flag as they constantly wage war? How far have they advanced since the teachings of the Prophet Mohamed entered their collective mind?

Let me rephrase that. How far have the Arab people regressed since Islam? I don’t need to recount the failures of Islam. History does.

The past 20 centuries of human history prove that Christianity can take any nation, language, or culture and launch it toward unprecedented success. The teachings of Jesus Christ make men more like God in character.

Those same centuries prove that Islam can take any race of people, and turn them more animalistic, brutal, and irrational. The teachings of the Prophet Mohamed make men like dogs.

And how do Muslims feel about the systematic failure of Islam compared to Christianity? Jealous. How do they respond? The same way Cain did toward Abel. Murder.

That’s the logic of Cain. Rather than look to what made Abel successful, he kills Abel. The terrible news here is that our president also thinks with the logic of Cain.

To Obama religion is religion. It shouldn’t matter if your holy book is the Bible, Torah, or the Quran. He bows to the Dali Llama just like he would to the Prophet Mohamed, or Buddha, or L Ron Hubbard.

So with his mouth, Obama suppresses the truth of Christianity’s success by equivocally comparing it with Islam. By reminding the public of embarrassing events in Christian history, he hopes to validate the premise that all religions are the same.

But with his actions he tacitly admits Christians’ stunning success. To prove this look to Obamacare.

If Obama cares so much about the health of human beings, why did he hijack the world’s best healthcare system? Why didn’t he bring his expertise to Indonesia or Kenya where they need drastic systematic improvements?

It’s because America has hospitals such as Beth Israel Deaconess, New England Baptist, and New York Presbyterian. America has health insurance providers such as Blue Cross and Blue Shield. Do you notice the Christian names?

Where is the Blue Crescent Blue Scimitar healthcare provider in Muslim countries? Where is the Prophet Mohamed Memorial Children’s Hospital? There isn’t one. The inventors of algebra now study Anatomy and Physiology to chop off infidel’s hands, feet, and heads.

The irony is that President “You didn’t build that” needs a healthcare system built by Christians to plaster his name over.

To pay for his grandiose schemes to fundamentally transform our Christian society, Obama needs to skim money off the top of the Protestant work ethic. And how does he justify his confiscatory and punitive tax code? By the words of Jesus Christ. He quotes, “To him who has been given much, much more will be required.” (Luke 12:48)

If Obama wants to throw out examples of injustices committed in Jesus’s name, he can recount every single time he or John Kerry has quoted the Bible.

Obama jumped into America’s cockpit to lower its altitude. It’s not fair that we’re cruising through the stratosphere while Islam plods along the ground. Since he can’t get Islam to take flight, he’ll bring us down some.

Islam also wants to see America’s altitude lowered. But not just a few hundred feet. All the way down to zero. So when Obama pushes the stick forward, they’ll hold it there screaming Allahu Akbar as we crash in flames.

My Critique of Jon Stewart. He’s no Limbaugh.

Guys, so many people are saying so many things about Jon Stewart’s departure from the Daily Show that I need to chime in. But first I got to say that I’ve barely watched the show. I don’t have tv let alone cable.

Here’s my critique. Calm down. Jon Stewart is not that amazing. Rush Limbaugh does what Stewart tries to do but much better. And Limbaugh has been doing it since the late 80’s. Limbaugh even had a television show that if you watched clips would make you think that the Daily Show looked to for “inspiration.”

Since this is a Christian blog, I need to quickly point out I’m not bashing John Stewart. Yes, he’s wicked talented, wicked smart, and wicked funny. He must have some big plans to leave the show and I wish him the best.

But he’s not this generation’s Mark Twain, or Ambrose Peirce, or Voltaire. You guys need to temper your assessment of him.

My first exposure to Jon Stewart came when I did have a tv because I still lived at my parents’ home. MTV promoted the heck out of his talk show. I still remember that commercial where Howard Stern claimed to be 6’3." I was just a young teenager at the time. ( so that goes to show you the long lasting influence of tv and why we don’t have cable now.)

I didn’t like his show because it was all about celebrity stuff and cool, inside jokes. Plus the guy was adored by the cool kids who listened to Alternative music, wore Doc Martins, and who made “mixed media” art with a message that would change the world.

These cool kids were mainstream countercultural. They wore Rage Against the Machine t-shirts and drove to school in brand new Toyota Camries their daddies bought them. They never realized how contrived their socially-acceptable rebellion was. And even though I was truly countercultural, to them, i was uncouth.

Then some time later, Comedy Central came out with a show called the Daily Show hosted by Craig Kilborne. It spoofed cable news shows. It was popular among my college classmates who lived off campus and therefore had cable.

One day, Kilborne announced he was leaving the show to host a late night talk show. He announced that Jon Stewart would take his place. He joked that Stewart wouldn’t be as good because he wasn’t blonde.

That was funny because news anchors only care about their hair.

When Stewart assumed his role, I thought he was terrible. The whole premise of the show was that it was supposed to be a news show. Back then, it should have been what the Onion television news is now.

All Steward did was deliver his regular standup routine while sitting down and wearing a suit. The whole news show premise was lost. Stewart just yelled, slapped the table, made faces, all while bitterly ridiculing people. That’s not news. That’s not even fake news!

It bothered me that the Daily Show became way more popular under Stewart. The show really became the Jon Stewart Show. Why bother with the whole news show routine when it became like any late night talk show but in the early evening?

Sure, the Daily Show kept some vestige of a fake news. Take for example the actor Steven Colbert, who played a fake conservative pundit. And that’s the clue as to why the show exploded into a cultural phenomenon.

Consider what Rush Limbaugh does. He comments on the news using humor. But does Limbaugh have an actor play a caricature of a liberal so all we conservatives can laugh at him? No! He doesn’t need one. Every day there are numerous sound bites of actual liberals doing and saying things in real life that we can laugh at.

But Jon Stewart, like all liberals, wages a war against straw men. This requires an actor to play out that part. They just cannot find enough actual material from racist, anti-science, homeschooling Republicans.

And that’s why liberals tune in. They need to reinforce their delusional perspective of reality. Anyone who loves America and votes for George Bush deserves to be pilloried and Jon Stewart will do that to Steven Colbert for you.

And his sloppy, non-news delivery added to that effect.

Again, consider Rush Limbaugh in comparison. He all by himself hosts a three hour radio show every week day. He has no visual aids, co-hosts, or teams of writers and interns. What he does is explain things. He makes the complex understandable through a coherent thought process.

Jon Stewart does not explain things. He takes one minute to set up a story. He does this with a small semblance of a news anchor. Then they play a clip of George Bush saying something. Then they cut to Jon Stewart with a sardonic grimace on his face. The audience cracks up. Stewart throws his pen behind him, thumps his hands on the news desk and says, “I give up.”

Or, “Give me a break.”

Or, “Uhh, weapons of mass destruction? Huh?!”

That one sentence punch line causes the studio audience to double over in laughter. It’s not an explanation of an idea. In fact, it’s a non sequitur.

But to his huge audience, it’s not what he says or even if the jokes make sense. It’s the ridicule in his voice, the brashness in his smirk, and the temerity of his wild gesticulations. Liberals tune into Jon Stewart for validation. They need reassurance that even though every thing they believe in is failing, that someone is going to still make fun of conservative boogymen.

You see, those kids who ironed their jeans and spit shined their Doc Martins back in the 90’s have grown up now. They come home from their professional job to their live in girlfriend and her two dogs and they need to know that they are still raging against the machine.

John Stewart tells them who the machine is now, even if he has an actor play a caricature of it. And he rages. Oh boy, he rages. But in a funny way. You can scoff together with him.

These cool kids still fail to see how contrived their rebellion is. What countercultural icon receives well wishes from the White House spokesman? Former President Bill Clinton and Massachusetts senator Elizibeth Warren tweeted out well-wishes for Jon Stewart. Can we really pretend that he’s a comedic rebel?

The Butler Interception and #DeflateGate VIDEO

Super Bowl Recap. Were the Patriots Lucky?

A lot of people are saying the New England Patriots didn’t win as much as the Seahawks lost.

Excuse my language. That’s a bunch of malarkey. That’s a bunch of friggin malarkey. Frick friggin frick stick malarkey. Again, excuse my language.

The Butler interception was a product of discipline on the Patriots part. Butler stuck to his assignment. The reason the Seahawks did not go to lynch is because WE SHUT HIM DOWN.

Super Bowl Preview. X’s and O’s. My Dog Attacks me pretending to be Vince Wilfork.


Guys, the dumbest thing I’ve heard is that the Patriots should contain Russell Wilson in the pocket. No. Big Vince needs to flush him out and the DEs and LBs need to do break down, move laterally and do jazz hands.


Alright, this is the last thing to be said about the game. Now it’s time to play!


Bible Verses for #DeflateGate

Bible Verses for #DeflateGate

Guys, claims mean nothing. Truth matters. Accusations mean nothing. Proof matters.

Someone CLAIMS the Patriot’s balls were deflated, then ACCUSES the Patriots of cheating. Excuse my language, but that’s a bunch of malarkey!

The Bible comes down HARD on those who make false accusations, who bear false witness, and who set traps on the innocent. The Holy Bible is not nice to hypocrites.

(NOTE: I’ll transcribe the Bible verses used later)

Patriots Predictions for Super Bowl XLIX vs Seattle Seahawks.

VIDEO: The Patriots did not cheat in #deflategate! The Colts did!

2 psi does not prove the patriots cheated. But 13 psi makes me suspect the Colts cheated!

The Patriots Did Not Cheat in #DeflateGate. The Colts Did!


When people heard that 11 of the 12 New England Patriots’ footballs were 2 psi too light at halftime, they all concluded the Patriots cheated. No! I say that the 2 psi drop indicates the Patriots did not cheat! Just read the rules.

The NFL Rulebook requires that both teams bring their balls to the NFL referees’s locker room for inspection before the game. Then the Operations Manual states, “Once the balls have left the locker room, no one, including players, equipment managers, ball boys, and coaches, is allowed to alter the footballs in any way.”

Did you read that? You cannot pump the footballs up or deflate them after the refs inspect them.

Right now some people are like, “Jimmy, that proves the Patriots cheated because their balls were lighter!”

No! The rules do not require the teams to maintain the balls in the required pressure range. In fact, since they cannot be altered after inspection, you can’t legally maintain the required 12.5 to 13.5 psi. Cold weather could cause Patriots balls to deflate and there’s nothing they could do.

“But the Indianapolis Colts footballs were fully inflated!”

Yea! Because THEY CHEATED!!

Maybe the Colts pumped their balls up during the game. Why? Maybe they schemed to drop a dime on the Patriots and accuse them of what any NFL team would be guilty of on a cold game day: under-inflated balls. And to make sure they didn’t also get in trouble, they topped their balls off.

If that’s true, they’re in violation of NFL Operations Manual which expressly prohibits altering the balls. They are the cheaters.

Oh, but they only inflated the balls to regulation pressure? That’s nice. But it doesn’t matter. The rules don’t allow you to alter the ball, even if it’s to bring the ball back to regulation pressure.

This would explain why the Colts’ players are acting really nice to the Patriots on twitter. Guilt.

This would explain why Colts’ Linebacker D’Qwell Jackson changed his story. Earlier this week, we heard Jackson noticed the Patriot’s football was soft after he intercepted it. But now he denies it. Maybe he never actually claimed that to begin with. It was all part of the script to sabotage the Patriots legacy.

This week, everyone will be doing science experiments on Wilson footballs. When the data comes in, it’s going to seem mighty peculiar that the Colts’ balls were still 13.5 psi at halftime.

Guys, today I made a bold accusation against the Colts. I’m a true New England Patriots fan. You frauds abandoned the team on account of 2 psi. Shame.

5 Reasons to SHUT UP about #DeflateGate — VIDEO

Some of youse are like judas iscariot. Except instead of 20 prices of silver, it’s 2 p.s.i.

Why Deflategate Is Bad For Quarterbacks With Tiny Hands (and Good For The Patriots)

Deflategate is bad news for quarterbacks with tiny hands. Since everyone in the United States of Patriots-hate-ica wants to make a huge deal of football psi, the NFL commissioner will be forced to act in a comprehensive way that in the end nobody will like.

Right now the rules allow each team to condition it’s own footballs before the game. Neither team has a huge advantage because if the New England patriots doctor the footballs the way they like, the Indianapolis colts can doctor the football the way they like!

That’s why the rule allows each team to provide their own balls at the beginning of the game and allows each team custody of the balls the throughout the game. (A football out of the factory box is uncatchable. )

The NFL rules allow a range of psi for the ball to be – a range! So each team has discretion if they want their balls plump or saggy. But the strict adherence to the letter of the rule occurs at one moment. When the refs weigh the ball.

Consider wrestling. What’s the first thing a wrestler does after weigh-ins before a match? He pigs out! He cuts weight over the week so when he’s on the scale he’s 112 pounds. Then he steps off the scale and stuffs his mouth with 6 pounds of Funions. When he’s on the mat he’s actually 118 pounds.

But his opponent is too! Lightweight wrestling isn’t a match against your opponent. It’s a match against horrible gas pains from Funions. That explains all the grunting.

Look, the patriots footballs just needed to fart, okay?!

But now Commissioner Roger Godell needs to be super fair for the Super Bowl. So he’s going to personally check that all balls for both teams are fed Funions smothered with chili.

Plump balls are hard to grip. They are hard to throw *and * hard to catch. Especially if you have tiny hands. And who has the tiniest hands in the NFL?

Russell Wilson, of the Seattle Seahawks! (Tinier than even Danny Woodhead.)

Tom Brady did just fine in the second half of the AFC championship game after the footballs were undoctored. But Russell Wilson might not fare so well if godell gives the poor footballs terrible gas pains.

Furthermore, a more catchable ball is also easier to intercept. So as you watch the Super Bowl consider that each of Richard Sherman’s batted balls could have been an interception– if the balls were properly deflated according to Patriots’ specifications.

Listen Patriots-hate-icans, deflategate will actually help the New England patriots in the Super Bowl because the Seahawks have such tiny hands!

NOTE: The solution for this problem is to change the rule so balls are allowed to be 2 psi lighter. That’s the way you do it, right, Indianapolis colts fans? Change the rules you don’t like after the fact.

Connecticut Earthquake caused by Windmills in Massachusetts?

When five earthquakes happen in a five and a half hour span in Oklahoma, you blame fracking. When five earthquakes happen in a five and a half hour span in Texas, you blame fracking. But when five earthquakes happen in a five and a half hour span in Connecticut, who do you blame? You sure can’t blame fracking!

I’ll tell you who I blame. Windmills.

Today, Connecticut experienced a series of tremors felt in Rhode Island and parts of Massachusetts. (It sounds widespread, but you Texans need to realize that the New England states are rinky-dink small.) So where’s the closest fracking location?

I tell you what. It isn’t in New York. Governor Cuomo banned fracking just as it became economically impractacle. So we’d have to look as far away as Pennsylvania for all those nasty injection wells and water trucks.

Are we to believe fracking as far away as Western Pennslvania caused an earthquake in Connecticut? I don’t. Instead, I believe the closest large scale windmill farm caused the earthquake. You can read my theory in my post, “Does Fracking cause Earthquakes? No. Windmills do.”

So where’s the closest windmill farm?

I tell you what. It isn’t in Connecticut. The liberals in the Constitution state want windmills, but not where they have to see them. In that regard they are just like their liberal friends outside Long Island sound on Cape Cod and Nantucket. Sustainable energy needs urgent action until it ruins their property values.

Wind farms are simply marvelous out in Western Massachsetts where Liberals only have to see them when they visit the Berkshires in the summer.

And that’s where, according to my research, the closest windmill farm might be. The Hoosac Wind Power Project. If you know a closer one, leave me a tip in the comments. I’m also considering if the windmill farms of Western New York could influence seismic activity in Connecticut. (I know that seems like far away, but again, remember all these states are pretty small.)

You know what’s crazy? I made a Youtube video about the giant exhaust fan for the Hoosac tunnel a few years back. Soon afterwards, there was an earthquake that I felt in the Mid-roof Freightliner. (I drive a Peterbilt now, don’t worry.) I was in Springfield when I felt it, so I immediately wondered if any damage was done to the Hoosac tunnel.

That video became a Google search result for that earthquake because I mentioned the earthquake in a note in the description wondering about the condition of the Big Bore.

No one left any good info. So I had to ask train conductors at the Beacon Hill rail yard in Boston. (which was also a scene for many of my youtube videos.)

So let me ask again. Did today’s five earthquakes damage the Hoosac tunnel at all? It would be so sad if Windmills built in the vicinity of the Hoosac tunnel made bricks fall or whatever because that windmill caused an earthquake some a hundred miles away.

The Anti-Science Witch Hunt.

OK quakes a result of windmill construction --

Guys, remember my post, Witch hunt witch hunt? I couldn’t help but think of it today as I read a post on boing boing about Climate scientist Michael Mann. He complains that Americans go on a witch hunt against Scientists with whom they disagree. He wrote about this in an article published in the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists, called “The Serengeti strategy: How special interests try to
intimidate scientists, and how best to fight back.”

Here we go again. Another witch hunt which hunt.

What is a witch hunt which hunt?

When liberals get backed into a logical corner, rather than admit their deception and renounce their folly, they scream “Witch Hunt!”

This instinctive reaction follows the adage “The best defense is a good offense.”

It puts the prosecutors of truth on the defensive, as they try to distance themselves from the undeserved bad reputation of anti-communist Senator Joe McCarthy who was supposed to share the crime of the Reverend Samuel Parris in the Salem Witch Trials, as depicted by playwright Arthur Miller, who was a communist.

Not everyone is fooled by this tactic. Mark Steyn mocked Michael Mann on the National Review Online on July 15, 2012.  Since then he has not backed down despite lawsuits brought by Dr. Mann accusing him of slander. (You can read about that on the daily caller.)

Think about what a witch hunt is. A group of medieval ministers accuse a woman of being a witch. Then they make it impossible for her to disprove her witchhood. In fact, every credible defense she makes only proves she is a witch. Then they hang her. Or crush her like they did to accused wizard Giles Corey.

Hey, she’s a witch! What else are you supposed to do?

That makes everyone hysterically afraid they might be accused of being a witch. Everyone’s on edge. Then some unscrupulous people take advantage of the situation and throw out some witch accusations against people they don’t like. Heh, heh, heh. If you can’t beat them, witch them. After all, Giles Corey had some land you wanted.

So liberals get in Americans’ minds that the communist scare of the 1950′s was nothing more than a witch hunt by Senator McCarthy. Except there were actually communists trying to infiltrate America.

So when Bill Clinton sold missile technology to the Communist Chinese in the 1990′s, even thought that actually happened, bringing it up is just a witch hunt!

Anti-Science Witch Hunt

Liberals fail to see that when they accuse conservatives of going on a witch hunt, they are stoking the same sociological phenomenon of a witch hunt. That’s why I call it a witch hunt witch hunt. Go ahead and try to prove you’re not conducting a witch hunt. It only further proves you’re hiding the fact you’re out to hang witches.

Accusing modern Americans of being anti-science is exactly like accusing a medieval woman of being a witch.

The clergy authoritatively declares that which is sacred and that which is of the devil. You better stay on their good side or else you will find yourself on trial for being a witch.

Hey! Who gets to decide what is science now-a-days? Liberals have taken the mantle. Liberals declare that which is science and condemn that which is anti-science, also known as Christian.

The followers of Jesus Christ have no business even pretending to offer empirical evidence or use objective reasoning. By definition, Christianity means you are anti-science.

Man Made Earthquakes from Windmills

Let me remind you that I, a devout Christian, postulated a theory that this burst of earthquakes we’re feeling in the United States is caused by windmills. I even made a graph to compete head-to-head against Michael Mann’s hockey stick graph.

Below is the proportional relationship between windmill farm output in Oklahoma and the incidences of magnitude 3 or greater earthquakes in Oklahoma.

Is it empirical? Yes. Did I use objective reasoning in my theory? Yes.

Is is Science? No. It’s anti-science because I’m a Christian.


OK quakes a result of windmill construction --

Will this survive the Anti-Science witch hunt?


Does Fracking Cause Earthquakes? No. Windmills Do.


Does fracking cause earthquakes? No. Windmills do.

Liberals look to the reports of increased earthquake activity and add it to their list of reasons why they hate fracking. Hold on there! I wouldn’t be so quick to blame fracking. In every place where earthquakes are on the rise, we see an increase in the construction of windmills.

Take, for example, this story by the Enid News about earthquakes in Oklahoma. It cites a U.S. Geological Survey that reports over 549 earthquakes greater than 3.0 magnitude in 2014. This is a drastic rise compared to 2013, when there were 109, and in 2012 when there were 39. This large, sudden rise demands we investigate windmills.

OK earthquakes

Instead, according to the Enid News, the USGS is investigating if injection wells associated with fracking are responsible for earthquakes.

What are injection wells? You may not be aware of this because I wasn’t until I began working in the oilfield, but oil wells actually produce more water than oil. The oil from a well goes to the refinery, but the produced water is pumped back deep underground at a place called an injection well. (And is transported to the injection well by Peterbilts.)

This distinction between an injection well and the fracking process itself doesn’t matter to a liberal who is determined to hate fracking. He just looks at this chart of earthquakes in Oklahoma and sees a sudden rise beginning in 2009. His conclusion: fracking is to blame.

Am I unfairly caricaturizing liberals? Judge for yourself.

On July 31, posted a headline that read, Is Fracking to Blame for Increase in Quakes in Oklahoma? On August 8, the Atlantic focused on fracking in its article Man-made Earthquakes are Changing the Seismic Landscape. MSNBC concluded in its headline on July 8, New study links Oklahoma earthquakes to fracking. The New Republic, however, exercized caution, using the word possibly when it published, Oklahoma Earthquakes Possibly Caused by Fracking.

Yes, these liberal news sites do mention the theory that it’s actually injection wells and not fracking. But the angle taken by the editors stokes their liberal readers’ frenzied hatred toward fracking. However, if the injection well theory is true, banning fracking is not necessary. Modifying the injection well disposal process alone could calm the earthquake epidemic – ifit’s true that injection wells cause the earthquakes.

The culpability of injection wells (and therefore fracking) comes into doubt when you consider two facts. First, the distribution of earthquakes does not correlate to the distribution of water injection wells. And second, the sudden rise in earthquakes did not begin until 2009.

Even the Atlantic in their fracking hit-piece struggles explaining the geography of the earthquakes. Speaking with Robert Williams, a geophysicist with the USGS, Adrienne LaFrance writes:

Why does fracking seem to be linked to an uptick in earthquakes in some places but not in others? “We don’t know exactly why,” Williams said. (Some of the other states where seismic activity is on the rise: Arkansas, Texas, and to a lesser extent, Ohio and Colorado.) “There are a lot of questions yet to be answered. But a key point: There are thousands of wastewater wells across Oklahoma and we’re seeing this concentration [of earthquakes] incentral Oklahoma.”

I’ll do him one better. There are thousands of injection wells all across the United States of America. Anywhere there is an oil well there is an injection well nearby. You cannot operate an oil well without an injection well because the water comes out of the ground at a ratio of 10 barrels to every one barrel of oil. Since this water is actually heavy salt water, you can’t dispose of it by dumping it on the ground. It must be injected beneath an impenetrable rock layer so it doesn’t pollute drinkable water aquifers.

So that means that if injection wells necessarily caused devastating earthquake epidemics, there would be earthquakes in every oil-producing state since Spindletop. Most importantly, it also means any oil production will lead to earthquakes regardless of whether fracking was used to stimulate the wells.

So again, why 2009 and why central Oklahoma?

Can we blame windmills?

The construction of windmill farms in Oklahoma correlates much better to the sudden upward trend of earthquakes. Remember the key year is 2009. That was long after fracking had already achieved widespread implementation. But it was just on the cusp of a massive uptick in windmill farm construction.

The windmill boom began in Oklahoma in 2003 with the construction of Oklahoma Wind Energy Center in Harper County, with a rated capacity of 102 Megawatts. According toinformation published by the Kansas Energy Information, between 2003 and 2008, Oklahoma allowed construction of 6 more bird-killing machines that together have a rated capacity of 706 MW. I say “rated” because who’s kidding who, windmills don’t produce energy like their proponents promise.

But then in 2009, things took a turn for the worse. Large truck convoys pulling loads too big for residential roads clogged Sooner state highways. Eerie metal monstrosities appeared everywhere on the horizon. Their looming stature, lethargic rotating, and sub-sonic droning caused unsettling feeling in people living nearby. Soon livestock were birthing defective offspring. Rumors swirled that the magnetic fields of these windmills next to the ranch were to blame.

Yes, 2009 was a big year. Oklahoma saw four massive windfarms come online. Each of these four were rated to put out between 99 and 127 MW. Compare that to the the previous six years which saw only seven windmill farms built.

Collectively, Oklahoma’s 11 windmill power plants totaled 1128 MW of electrical power. That’s a lot, right? 1128 MEGA WATTS!

All of these windmills turn wind energy into electrical energy, measured in mega watts. 1128 Mega Watts sounds great to a liberal who didn’t do so well in physics class. There’s one big factor he left out of the equation. The clue is in the following passage I found at an online science tutor,, discussing energy:

A common scene in some parts of the countryside is a “wind farm.” High-speed winds are used to do work on the blades of a turbine at the so-called wind farm. The mechanical energy of the moving air gives the air particles the ability to apply a force and cause a displacement of the blades. As the blades spin, their energy is subsequently converted into electrical energy (a non-mechanical form of energy) and supplied to homes and industries in order to run electrical appliances.

The wind applies force to the windmills. Enough force to generate 1128 megawatts. But do the windmills fall over when the wind blows on them? No. So that means that even though some of the wind energy is turned into electrical energy, something else is applying enough force in the opposite direction of the wind to keep the windmills erect. What is that thing? I’ll give you a clue. It’s what the windmills are anchored into: the ground.

The ground keeps the windmills standing up in the fierce winds that whip up in the Oklahoma plains. Yet, as rugged as we think the ground is, it is actually just broken pieces of the earth’s crust floating on currents of magma. So besides turning wind energy into electrical energy, windmills transfer wind energy into kinetic energy by doing work on the tectonic plate. The plate therefore moves in the same direction as the prevailing wind.

Since some of you may be English majors, let me ask you this: Have you ever seen a hoovercraft on the ocean? Have you ever seen a fan boat on the bayou? These boats float on the water and are propelled by a giant fan. What I’m saying is that windmills turn the ground they are on into a giant hoovercraft.

You know the major cause of earthquakes, right? It’s when one of the earth’s tectonic plates crashes into another? Well what do you think happens when you build a ton of windmills in western Oklahoma and the whole ground crashes into eastern Oklahoma? You get tons of earthquakes in Central Oklahoma!

The windmill boom where it literally booms

Remember that 2009 was the year when the windmill building boom just took off. (Together with magnitude 3.0 earthquakes.) In the several years after, Oklahoma kept building many more farms. In 2012 alone, they built 10. One of those, the Canadian Hills Wind Farm, keeps 135 turbines in operation with a total capacity of 295 MW. By the end of 2012, there were 26 wind farms online with a projected capacity of 3.175 Gigawatts.

Say this in a Dr. Emmet Brown voice, “3.175 Gigawatts! Marty, you can’t just go building windmills and get 3.175 gigawatts.”

If we take the USGS chart of the magnitude 3.0 earthquakes in Oklahoma, and add to it the collective capacity of windfarms by year, we see a trend that shows a proportional correlation.

OK quakes a result of windmill construction --

The time for action is now! Windmills cause earthquakes. You still don’t believe me? Well too bad. We’re shutting down all windmill construction until you can prove otherwise.

NY Bans Fracking For Health Reasons

New York govenor Andrew Cuomo wants to ban fracking for health reasons. Guys, I live in West Texas. It’s a veritable forest of pump jacks and drilling rigs. If fracking was as bad as liberals believe, this area would be an uninhabitable toxic waste dump.

But it’s not. West Texas is a booming center of economic activity. People, like me, are coming here from all over in order to thrive. If anything, fracking is good for your health. Especially the health of your wallet.

Let’s compare and contrast west Texas with western New York.

The last time I visited western New York, I saw an abandoned Kodak factory. We drove past an abandoned mall to look at an abandoned subway tunnel. Then we dined near an abandoned passenger ferry terminal. The kids enjoyed biking on a paved-over abandoned railway.

Upstate New York’s entrepreneurs take advantage of low rent in abandoned red-brick warehouses and abandoned factories. It provides their businesses with a hip, retro location– until Albany’s crippling regulations and insurance costs put them under.

But the real entrepreneurs in western New York make the big bucks demolishing all these abandoned buildings so the owners don’t need to pay property taxes on them anymore. Business is going so well for these demolition companies that they hope to one day break even.

“We ain’t got time for that” – West Texas

Am I trying to say there are no abandoned buildings in west Texas? Pfft. No! There are tons of creepy abandoned farm houses, roller rinks, and pool halls. But the building boom is so strong and the empty space so abundant that nobody cares to tear anything down.

Steel buildings are flying up for oil and gas companies all around Midland, Texas. If you can wear work boots and swing a hammer you’ll be building houses to address the shortage. Truck stops such as Loves, Pilot, and Stripes built brand new locations far off the interstate highway to meet demand from hungry truckers and their tucks.

Dominoes pizza opened up in Andrews, Texas and quickly became the country’s top grossing location. Mcdonalds in midland will pay you $15 an hour to flip burgers and they got a courtesy shuttle if you don’t have a ride.

Wait a minute. $15 an hour to work a Mcdonalds? Isn’t that what protesting fast food workers in New York City demanded?! Yes! Hydraulic fracturing created such an economic boom in west Texas that fast food workers made nearly double new york’s minimum wage.


Right now some of you are like, “Jimmy, the price of oil is dropping so the fracking boom is going to go bust!”

Yup. The price of oil is dropping. That’s exactly why Governor Cuomo came out against fracking. When oil peaked right above $100 a barrel, I don’t remember him taking a strong, public stand against fracking.

What if oil had gone up to $200 a barrel? Imagine the millions of dollars fracking would generate through the New York State’s income tax. All the mineral rights would boost assessed property values for taxation. At $200 a barrel, even Albany’s biggest moonbat liberal would brush off any imagined health concerns from fracking. I mean, that’s a lot of tax money to waste– er, excuse me– appropriate.

But oil didn’t soar. It tumbled down to nearly $50 a barrel. So Andrew Cuomo took a big, bold stand against a controversial procedure right after it was no longer profitable to do in New York. Wow. What principled leadership!

If the govenor cares so much about the public health of western New York, I know what he should focus on. You know all those abandoned buildings I mentioned? During the frigid adirondack winters, they were warmed with steam heat. The pipes that carried that steam were insulated with asbestos.

There’s new york’s health problem. Asbestos. Fracking doesn’t have anything on the environmental disaster of new york’s asbestos abatement problem. The keystone xl pipeline is a green technology compared to the steam pipes of New York.

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